How to Put a Baby Down for a Nap

You're looking in the wrong place.

Don't look to the internet for solutions. And don't offer your specific advice on the internet. This is what happens: A desperate, harried, first-time mom is listening to her baby scream from the next room as she googles, "my eight-month old baby won't nap" and spends an hour clicking and scrolling through scads of contradictory, extremely specific advice, swimming in anecdotes, other desperate pleas for guidance, and testimonials for one or another baby expert's one-size-fits-all "sleep system," leaving her more confused and discouraged than ever. "I'm a terrible mom!" I -- I mean, she -- thinks. "What kind of mother can't get her baby to take a nap?" Now, multiply that one woman by a couple hundred thousand. Not a pretty picture!

Take a deep breath, and call your mother. Whatever she tells you, if it feels right, try it. If it doesn't feel right, do what I just started doing. My mother is no longer reachable by conventional methods, so I imagine what she might say. Her "answer" is actually what I feel in my gut, so I'm really just asking my own inner mom. And that's almost always the right answer.

If I have learned anything in the nine months I have been a mother (ha! veteran moms are holding their sides in from laughing at my naivete!), it's that babies are as different as adults. You don't see all adults going to bed and waking up at the same time, eating the same foods, working the same jobs. Babies have personality types, tastes, and idiosyncrasies just like their parents do, and you have to do what works for your baby.

"Gee, thanks," I can hear you say. "Not helpful! I have a screaming, sleepy baby here that won't take the nap that I know will make him feel better!" I know, it sucks, and I'm sorry. You can try every technique you read online or in a book, if that makes you feel better. But talking to just one or two other mothers (not every mommy you know or meet on the playground... we're trying to limit input here!), and talking to your inner mommy may be a little more peaceful. And if you are anything like me, a little peace is all you want right now.

Good luck out there.